Hi Lumi! If you're still doing this, could I please have some input on my MBTI? You typed me one of my previous threads as a 3w4, which is spot on, but I wanted your input specifically on my MBTI.
1) Context:
- What is your age range and general location (Country so that cultural values can be taken into account)? Do you have any impairments that may affect the way that you answer this questionnaire? Any religious or political beliefs (or anything else along those lines) that also might have an effect?
18-20, I’ve lived in a few different countries, mostly Western ones. I have social anxiety but don’t have any prominent religious or political beliefs that’d affect the way I answer this test. <3
b) Which types are you currently considering? Why are you considering them and why haven’t you decided on one?
I’m considering all types (except ESFJ) which have a Fe dom or aux. I’m not so sure about ENFJ because I’m not very outgoing and I’m not particularly extroverted (I’m more introverted). And I’m not sure about IxFJ because I like attention and success, so that contradicts the humility of ISFJ particularly.
One of the reasons I considered ENFJ for a while was because I often find it interesting to study people and their psychologies and motivations, rather than my own mind and ideas, and the world or greater areas of study. I like talking to people and asking what they'd do and how they'd feel in hypothetical situations. I'm not sure if this is a good indication but I watched a video of Frank James distinguishing between INFJ and ENFJ and he said that INFJ usually focuses on themes when watching a movie, while ENFJ focuses on characters, which is certainly me. I also relate to having a tricky sense of Ti, where I understand my reasoning for things but couldn't always properly explain it or help others in very similar situations. It's a tricky conflict between my Fe and Ti where I can and want to help but I also don't want to feel responsible and possibly put someone in a tricky situation.
I considered ISFJ for a while because I'm also very organised and appreciate structure. I look to the past and what's been done before to help me make my decisions and chart my own course. However, I also feel like I'm prouder, vainer and more self-centered than the average ISFJ.
2) What do you deem as your purpose in life?
I want to be happy, of course, but I also want to accomplish goals and look back on my years with satisfaction when I’m older. I want happy relationships, exciting experiences, and an excellent career.
3) Of the seven deadly sins, which one(s) do you relate to the most and the least and why?
I relate most to pride. It’s very important to me, and a lot of what I do relates back to my pride. For example I never want to be made a joke of, and it upsets me greatly when I let people take advantage of me. It also hurts my pride to think back to all the times I didn’t stand up for myself. Now I focus on being respectful and kind to other people but I like to meet people in the middle, instead of making a massive effort, because I don’t like the disappointment when my efforts aren’t reciprocated. I also don’t like admitting that I need reciprocation because I feel it makes me look needy and pathetic.
I also like to achieve things for the social merit they hold, as well as the fulfillment. For example, telling someone you know a lot about certain distinguished subject inspires respect, which I crave and appreciate.
I relate least to wrath. I feel my anger in envy and regret often. I repress direct anger.
4) Analyzing your relationships with others, briefly describe:
- The type of people you are drawn to
I am usually drawn to people who are very confident in themselves, funny and quietly interesting. They don't outwardly seek anyone’s approval but still have loads of commendable attributes. They also are usually quieter, preferring to do their own thing than to lead or follow, which I like. I also like sensitive people, but I also worry that advice I give them isn’t sufficient or helpful.
b) The type of people who are drawn to you
The people who are drawn to me are relatively quiet and completely kind. It’s interesting because I always believed I impressed upon people that I was too very reserved and quiet, but a lot of people think I’m more outgoing than I feel. Those people are honestly very kind and open about their feelings. I really like talking to them because of how open and expressive they are, when they’re familiar with you. I don’t talk about my feelings often but I like to hear how other people conceptualise their own.
c) The type of people you are repulsed by
I am repulsed by people who put others down for the fun of it, not simply because they’re in anger or pain, but because they find it funny. Putting anyone down for any reason is horrible but doing so for your own amusement is close to inexcusable.
5)What are the traits in others that you admire but you cannot emulate yourself? Elaborate.
Uninhibited confidence and courage. If someone tries to hurt me, I put on a brave front, and when adrenaline’s going, I can also say something back. However, most of the time my feelings are all over the place and I can’t understand them. I can defend loved ones but it’s hard for me to stand up for myself.
Also, possibly being more self-assured and less naive/trusting, with which I struggle. I admire people who can make decisions without other people's input and opinions. I make long pro-con lists and analyse my choices, but I still need and like other people to count of them. Like if I were to enter a relationship with someone six years older than me (as an example), I would ask other people what they'd do in my position and want to know what they think, because I know that isn't a conventional choice - in my circle.
6) Describe your relationship with the following:
a) Anger
I repress anger now. I’ll look back on some of the times I felt immensely angry as a child with shame and quickly think about something else afterwards. I usually express anger in biting remarks or a cold exterior. If I can’t ignore or repress it, I’ll cry, but I try and stop that response.
b) Shame
Shame is another emotion I repress but actively work to avoid. Once a week I’ll think of something I wish I could take back or erase. I feel like they’re long-term indications that I’ll never be perfect.
c) Fear
Because I have anxiety, I think fear is more present in my life than it would be without it. I often fear people’s anger or sadness, and try earnestly to avoid it. When I think someone’s in a bad mood, I either try to cheer them up or give them space. I’ll occasionally try and say something understanding as well or open up a conversation (but in a way that they can deny it if they want).
d) Love/passion
I think I experience passion more than love. Love is one of those abstract things I feel for friends and family, and can easily understand because they’ve been in my life so long. However, when it comes to loving romantically, it’d take me a while to understand when it progresses from infatuation to love, because I don’t think about my deep feelings and focus on the sentiments that are easier to reach and express.
e) Conflict
I’m not particularly conflict-avoidant but I rarely seek it out. I try to compromise or agree to disagree. When I’m in a position of answering to someone who has power over me or of whom I’m afraid, I’ll reluctantly concede and sometimes play innocent/dumb, so my responses don’t trigger them (it’s more of coping mechanism than a conscious decision). However, with people I’m on equal footing with I’ll try to reasonably and maturely express my opinion. Sometimes I like to be quippy and intelligent, but it also makes me look pretentious so I use that
sometimes.
7) What are some of the themes that have played a prominent role in your life (ie. A struggle you’ve been unable to conquer, ect)?
A recurring theme has been finding the next big thing. I’ve always had big dreams, some of which are unrealistic, but I worked on them to the best of my ability. It’s actually been a struggle because I achieved very few of those dreams, which affected my own feelings of worth. However I rarely acknowledge the feelings of unworthiness and look for the next best thing or quietly concede before looking for the next best thing.
8) Answer only one of the following:
a) [College aged and above] What is your area of work/study? Why did you choose this and would you change it? If so, what would be your ideal?
I’m studying English, Economics and Political science (not majors, just major areas). I chose English and Polisci because I wanted to go into journalism one day but switched over to Economics in as well, because I want greater options. Now I think I would much prefer to go into business than into journalism.
9) When meeting a new person, what do you tend to focus on?
I tend to focus on the way they word things (this happens more when I communicate with them over text or email solely/as well), how they treat other people and me. I notice other distinguishing features like how cheerful they seem and what they usually talk about.
10) How do you feel about humanity as a whole? What do you feel are some of the biggest problems the human race faces and why?
This is a mundane answer but humanity is complex. I’m not one of those people who think we’re inherently terrible and evil. I think we’ve evolved to the best of our ability but it’d still serve us to work on ourselves and help each other in that regard.
I feel some of the biggest problems the human race struggles with are insufficient communication and overall inequality.
11) What are some of your hobbies and interests?
Painting, reading, exercise, discovering new musical groups and artists (this is one of my favourite things to do), talking for hours with people I love, drinking coffee, occasionally cooking.
13) How do you usually “hang out†with your friend(s)? When answering, think about what activities you tend to choose, whether you hang out with one person at once or many, whether or not you initiate the interaction.
When I hang out with my friends, we mostly just spend time together and talk. I usually hang out with one friend at a time but wish I had more mutual friends so we could hang in a group. I initiate the interaction with some friends or to be polite, if they usually initiate the interaction, but in general, I think it’s 50/50 or I wait for them to begin first.
14) What is more important, actions or words? Why?
Actions are more important than words, because, in my opinion, follow-through is so important. You can make promises with your words but if you don’t actually demonstrate them, they lose their importance.
15) Oh dear, you’ve been cursed by a witch! It’s ok though, you get a choice on which curse you will receive. Will you choose….
a) To never be able to experience the sensation of taste
b) To be immortal
c) To lose your memories
d) To be poor for the rest of your life
e) Or to never experience passion
Elaborate on why!
I will choose never experiencing passion. I feel like passion is one of those things that would theoretically waste my time if I indulged in it. The temporary fulfillment of doing something fun and completely engaging doesn’t equate to long term fulfillment. If I didn’t experience passion, I’d still have a ton of other fun things to experience. And furthermore, I could still be or present as a passionate person, so I wouldn’t discourage others from that either.
16) What do you hope to avoid being? If it helps, describe a person who embodies what you avoid/you as a villain, ect.
I don’t want to be someone who gives up on themself or others. I never want to stop caring about my appearance or my eventual career because it’s easier not to. I want to keep trying to be the best version of myself. I also don't want to ever take advantage of other people's kindness and advantage, and to convey proper thankfulness and appreciation for it.
17) How do you relate to obsession? Do you tend to "merge" with others or your interests? How do you feel about the idea of doing this?
I definitely merge with my interests, less so with other people. When I enjoyed painting, I decided I was artsy. When I was temporarily very “cowabunga!” for lack of a better word, I would identify as very carefree, even though that isn’t me at all. When I was especially into fitness, I’d give people health tips.
I don’t merge with other people. I try and relate to them and emphasise between us the qualities we both share but that wouldn’t become part of my general identity. I remember a friend and I used to bond because I thought I was an INFP as she was, and it made me a bit sad that I don’t relate to that anymore.
Sometimes I try and emulate qualities in fictional characters I admire, but I wouldn’t say I “merge” with them.
18) Organized or messy? Plans and blueprints or impulse and surprises? What are you preferences and tendencies?
Organised to the best of my ability. Sometimes I’ll be a bit messy but I try my hardest to be mostly organized.
Plans and blueprints all day. I love lists and plans.
19) How do you subjectively view comfort and how do you create comfort in your life and surroundings?
I view comfort as not having any imminent stressful responsibilities and appointments. Also as generally being in a comfortable environment with people I’m familiar with. I create comfort but having little parts of the day I can always enjoy like a cup of tea or coffee, by having a routine, by doing something healthy for myself (like exercising/taking a long walk) and productive (like work obviously, reading chapters of a classic and journalling)