[NT] Are you shy or reserved?

[danseen]

I see some INTO traits in myself, but i am not shy at all, but reserved.

To me there is a distinction. I don't fear people, but will admittedly take a back seat since I don't give a fuck and will get to know new people on my own terms.

Besides, how the "psychologists" label this is bull. the reality is more complex. NOt all E's will be open in all situations, they may ignore some out of bias, prejudice, hate or spite, or feel tired or too ill to contribute to social scenarios. whilst reserved people may not be as visibly "wild" doesn't we don't have the same biases, prejudices and general feeling as Es do..

 

[chubber]

Interesting reading that from an INTP. I thought most INTPs are shy, while INTJs would be, introverted as in, not shy/reserved after they get to know you. I guess I learn everyday.

 

[ceecee]

I see some INTO traits in myself, but i am not shy at all, but reserved.

To me there is a distinction. I don't fear people, but will admittedly take a back seat since I don't give a fuck and will get to know new people on my own terms.

Besides, how the "psychologists" label this is bull. the reality is more complex. NOt all E's will be open in all situations, they may ignore some out of bias, prejudice, hate or spite, or feel tired or too ill to contribute to social scenarios. whilst reserved people may not be as visibly "wild" doesn't we don't have the same biases, prejudices and general feeling as Es do..

I'm not shy. I wouldn't even say I'm reserved most of the time. I'm selective, not because I don't give a fuck but but because I love observing. That said, there are days I'm more social and extroverted than my ENFJ even (and that's astounding, I know).

 

[SensEye]

I am both somewhat shy and somewhat reserved.

 

[Stanton Moore]

I'm both...

 

[Stansmith]

Both.

 

[Froody Blue Gem]

Yes, I can be pretty shy and cautious, as well as reserved especially around new people. I suppose there is an element of fear of rejection. Large groups of people generally make me uneasy if I am unfamiliar with the people in the group. I may engage in awkward smalltalk, but not give too much away. Or talk about things that are not too personal. I also may be reluctant to open up, especially if the opening up is pried out of me. I need a little time, if things move too quickly it doesn't work out for me.

 

[Obfuscate]

i say i am shy sometimes because it is easier than explaining that i don't think expressing myself or getting involved with others is often worth the energy... when i want to be expressive or to get to know someone, it becomes pretty clear that i am not... i am very reserved however... i am not entirely certain how i choose with whom to speak and how little to say, but generally i say very little to very few... and if i think people aren't paying enough attention, i begin to track the frequency... at some point i quit speaking to them... i like to think that because i say so little, that people should listen a bit when i do speak...

 

[Totenkindly]

I'm reserved/shy when I don't know anyone, mainly in the sense of not being great at knowing how to start a conversation. Jumpstarting a cold contact is not something I am great at, although I've tried to improve myself a bit.

However, I have a pretty open attitude and am always looking for people who might interest me or who I could make a meaningful connection with. So if I feel reward is larger than risk, I have no qualms about being more open if I can find a way forward / know someone well enough.

I have a more extroverted friend who last week told me I don't seem introverted to her; but the deal is that if I know you and feel comfortable around you, then I can be forward, open, more emotive, crazier, I know I can seem far more extroverted than I feel in general. (Meanwhile, if I don't trust you or don't know you, I will hang back until I have a better understanding of you.) I also don't necessarily need to trust EVERYONE in a particular group, as long as I trust a few people, I'm okay interacting with them and simultaneously being exposed to others who are around.

I think I do worst in a room where I'm the most "extroverted" person -- if I make attempts to connect and get nothing back, I shut up / pull back really fast.

 

[Maou]

I am reserved, not shy. I am not afraid to start conversations for my own enjoyment. I am in a constant battle with boredom, and its quite difficult to find someone I can talked to someone unreservedly.

 

[The Cat]

I can be.

 

[Hellena Handbasket]

I'm reserved around people I don't know very well, but I am not shy.
Quiet in large groups but very warm and open one on one.
When I like someone or think we should be friends, I can be very straightforward.