[ENFJ] ENFJ's in Relationships

[ReflecTcelfeR]

I can't edit the title, but their should be an 'a' between the last two words and no 's' on the end. How did the other person ask to be yours? Did it just happen? Was it 'magical', or was it up front? Preferrably girl ENFJ's but anything about your type from anyone is welcome.

 

[Sparrow]

So my boyfriend is an ENTP, I thought it was kinda magical (in the beginning till he screwed up anyway)...

We first met while I was on a date with another guy at an art gallery. He was a friend of my best friends boy friend. Anyway, he was charming & we critiqued art together it was awesome! He tried to get me to hang out afterwards, but I had to go to Korea the next day. He got upset that I couldn’t hang out with him and I over heard him call me a bitch on my other friends cell phone-he’s loud lol. I was pissed and didnt like him much after that.

He kept pestering my friend about me, so I gave him a 2nd chance. He cooked me a beautiful dinner at his place, we had so much in common and had such great conversation .

We dated for about a month and I decided that I wasn’t ready to be in a committed relationship. He was persistent and would not give up (a real go getter this guy is lol). So finally one day I was like FINE! Okay! Lets make it official…we have been together for almost 4 years now .

 

[runvardh]

So my boyfriend is an ENTP, I thought it was kinda magical (in the beginning till he screwed up anyway)...

We first met while I was on a date with another guy at an art gallery. He was a friend of my best friends boy friend. Anyway, he was charming & we critiqued art together it was awesome! He tried to get me to hang out afterwards, but I had to go to Korea the next day. He got upset that I couldn’t hang out with him and I over heard him call me a bitch on my other friends cell phone-he’s loud lol. I was pissed and didnt like him much after that.

He kept pestering my friend about me, so I gave him a 2nd chance. He cooked me a beautiful dinner at his place, we had so much in common and had such great conversation .

We dated for about a month and I decided that I wasn’t ready to be in a committed relationship. He was persistent and would not give up (a real go getter this guy is lol). So finally one day I was like FINE! Okay! Lets make it official…we have been together for almost 4 years now .

LOL, I've watched an ENTP do something similar with this one girl over the course of a year and a half. They're married now.

 

[ReflecTcelfeR]

So my boyfriend is an ENTP, I thought it was kinda magical (in the beginning till he screwed up anyway)...

We first met while I was on a date with another guy at an art gallery. He was a friend of my best friends boy friend. Anyway, he was charming & we critiqued art together it was awesome! He tried to get me to hang out afterwards, but I had to go to Korea the next day. He got upset that I couldn’t hang out with him and I over heard him call me a bitch on my other friends cell phone-he’s loud lol. I was pissed and didnt like him much after that.

He kept pestering my friend about me, so I gave him a 2nd chance. He cooked me a beautiful dinner at his place, we had so much in common and had such great conversation .

We dated for about a month and I decided that I wasn’t ready to be in a committed relationship. He was persistent and would not give up (a real go getter this guy is lol). So finally one day I was like FINE! Okay! Lets make it official…we have been together for almost 4 years now .

This makes me hopeful. I see some similar dynamics here between your situation and mine. This is good.

 

[Sparrow]

Yes, dont give up! Oh and is it true that guys like the chase?

 

[ReflecTcelfeR]

I do. I get nervous, but it's exhilerating! There is something about uncertainty that's amazing. Not knowing if you will succeed or fail. It's a RUSH!

 

[Sparrow]

^ Sooo, whats the story!? Share

 

[Valiant]

Heh, i've "chased" an ENFJ on and off since I was 16. You guys are freaking impossible

 

[ReflecTcelfeR]

Well, her name is Loren. I've only known her for a little over a year. We first talked after a theatre award show that high schools from around the area all gathered for and from there we just started hanging out, in groups. The award show was towards the end of the school year. We didn't really talk the beginning, or middle of summer because she was already infatuated with someone else. Towards the end we started hanging out almost everyday. After going to see a movie together (It was Ponyo a Maysuki film) we went for a walk in the park. This is where I told her that I had feelings for her. I think I came on too strong, my personality does that sometimes, and she was weary from the infatuation that she had before. The other guy is a bit of a crazy (nice, but crazy). So she said she just wanted to just relax for a while. I agreed.

Well, we were going into our first year of college, and as life does things we went to different colleges, where she met someone else. I understood. It made sense she and I never really had time to see each other and so for a while we both moved on. She just happened to find someone else. I was a little heart-broken, but I do my best not to be jealous and I grinned. He was a really cool guy and I don't know exactly why they broke up. I really liked him. Anyway. This happens over the course of both semesters of our first year. She is yet again single, and we've been hanging out alot again (alone as well as with friends). I feel weird knit-picking such small acts, but a couple of nights ago we were watching the first Lord of the Rings. Another friend of hers was there ( a guy friend), and we texted too each other even though we were right next to each other. I've never done that before and I think it means something. She keeps offering for me to come over and watch movies with her and tv shows and I'm going to quickly take her up on that offer once she gets back into town. I just want to make sure that when I ask her again, after time, that it's perfect, or as perfect as it can get. That's the abridged story. I only put in monumental, or I suppose what I find to monumental moments in this story. I've never been good with wooing girls that's why I made this thread. I want to do it right this time.

And there you have it.

 

[Sparrow]

Awe, thats sweet! Texting each other back in forth like that . My tips: Wine and dine her...try to find out her favorite food and maybe try and make it romantic, oh and make her feel like a Queen <3. Keep us posted kay! .

 

[Unkindloving]

I would say that the start of my current relationship is my favorite relationship commencement to date. It was deliciously awkward and direct, which is probably a key element between ENFJs and INFPs (or it should be).

I'm laughing about it now, because neither of us asked. We both just declared. We had both acknowledged getting along and having feelings for one another.
I aggressively declared "I think we should date" one night, after reaching for how to phrase it. He responsed with "What does that entail?" then said "I agree..." He was still wanting clarity. The next night, we defined dating for about two hours before i asked where we stood. We briefly discussed the decision falling into his lap and then he effortlessly ended with "Okay, we're dating."
I don't know what i love so damn much about it, but it's always going to stand out.
-

I've only had one relationship with an ENTP and i really wasn't sure on if i wanted to date him. I don't think i would have, but he badgered me until i agreed. He did this thing where he tried to tell me what i was thinking or feeling. It was so obnoxiously irritating and offbase .
Badgering is a no-no.
I prefer to really get a handle on my feelings before i get involved with someone and start a relationship. It doesn't have to be anything fancy, but i'd say get a feel for the ENFJ. Some of us like the chase and to be aggressive. Some of us want a little break from it. Some of us just want to be met in the middle with it, as the give and take is awesome.

 

[ReflecTcelfeR]

Okay! Thank you . I shall begin formulating a plan.

 

[ReflecTcelfeR]

I would say that the start of my current relationship is my favorite relationship commencement to date. It was deliciously awkward and direct, which is probably a key element between ENFJs and INFPs (or it should be).

I'm laughing about it now, because neither of us asked. We both just declared. We had both acknowledged getting along and having feelings for one another.
I aggressively declared "I think we should date" one night, after reaching for how to phrase it. He responsed with "What does that entail?" then said "I agree..." He was still wanting clarity. The next night, we defined dating for about two hours before i asked where we stood. We briefly discussed the decision falling into his lap and then he effortlessly ended with "Okay, we're dating."
I don't know what i love so damn much about it, but it's always going to stand out.
-

I've only had one relationship with an ENTP and i really wasn't sure on if i wanted to date him. I don't think i would have, but he badgered me until i agreed. He did this thing where he tried to tell me what i was thinking or feeling. It was so obnoxiously irritating and offbase .
Badgering is a no-no.
I prefer to really get a handle on my feelings before i get involved with someone and start a relationship. It doesn't have to be anything fancy, but i'd say get a feel for the ENFJ. Some of us like the chase and to be aggressive. Some of us want a little break from it. Some of us just want to be met in the middle with it, as the give and take is awesome.

Hmmmm... I don't like badgering, so that should be easy to avoid. I like the directness too, that's always great because I have no idea what she thinks of me I can only speculate.... I'm thinking classic dinner and a movie... I like that cliche a great deal. I'm so glad I found this place.

 

[Risen]

while I was on a date with another guy ...

PERFECT description!

 

[Sparrow]

Hey!!!! It was just a date I barely knew the guy, & he was scary anyway! Turns out he used to be addicted to meth so he had symptoms of psychosis....he talked about seeing aliens, having a scalpel collection, and he also had an obsession with knives. Creeepy dude, do you blame me!?

 

[ReflecTcelfeR]

At least he was up front about it? I don't think that's first date conversation material.
"So what are you hobbies?"
"I collect scalpels!"
"Oh... I have to use the restroom."

 

[Sparrow]

LOL He was actually in my nightmares for a while...lurking in the darkness.

 

[ReflecTcelfeR]

That's not good, hahaha.

 

[INTPness]

Hey!!!! It was just a date I barely knew the guy, & he was scary anyway! Turns out he used to be addicted to meth so he had symptoms of psychosis....he talked about seeing aliens, having a scalpel collection, and he also had an obsession with knives.

Oh you went on a date with an ENFP too, eh?

 

[Sparrow]

He was more of a P.S.Y.C.H.O. lol.